The Simpsons Forever
The Simpsons Forever
Episode 14 Season 2 7G03 October 11, 1990
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Bart Gets an F
  • Bart Gets an F
  • Bart Gets an F
  • Bart Gets an F
  • Bart Gets an F
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Notable Quotes in This Episode
Martin Prince
You're killing me fish. Never have I seen a greater or more noble thing than you, brother. Come on and kill me. I do not care who kills who. To catch a fish. To kill a bull. To make love to a women. To live. I thank you... oh please, call me Papa.
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Bart Simpson
A little ketchup for your buns, Papa? (laughs)
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Bart Simpson
Fellow students, prepare to be dazzled! Well, as Mrs. Krabapple already mentioned, the name of the book that I read was Treasure Island. It's about these pirates. Pirates with patches over their eyes and shiny gold teeth... and green birds on their shoulders. Did I mention this book was written by a guy named Robert Louis Stevenson and published by the good people at McGraw Hill. So, in conclusion, on the Simpson scale of one-to-ten. Ten being the highest, one being the lowest, and five being average. I give this book a nine. Any questions? No. Then I'll just sit down.
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Bart Simpson
Mrs. Krabapple I'm insulted. Is this a book report or a witch hunt?
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Marge Simpson
Soups on! Hurry up or it'll get that icky skin on the top.
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Homer Simpson
Ooow, that reminds me. It's big gorilla week on million dollar movie... c'mon boy!
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Marge Simpson
The little tiger tries so hard. Why does he keep failing?
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Otto
Oh, sorry little buddy. Can't do it on purpose. But hey, maybe you'll get lucky!
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Bart Simpson
Ok, no reason to panic. Find an egghead, bum him for some answers and boom I'm back on easy street.
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Martin Prince
As a natural enemy I don't know why I should care but the information pertaining to America's colonial period that you just received is erroneous... A blind folded chimp with a pencil in his teeth has a better chance of passing this test than you do.
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Dr. J. Loren Pryor
I think what we have on our hands here is a classic case of what laymen refer to as fear of failure. As a result Bart is an underachiever and yet he seems to be... how should I put this?... proud of it.
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Bart Simpson
Ok. Ok! Why are we dancing around the obvious. I know it. You know it. I am dumb. Ok. Dumb as a post. Think I'm happy about it?
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Bart Simpson
Oh, I wish it were that simple. As shameful and emotionally crippling as it may be, I'm afraid my recommendation is for Bart Simpson to repeat the fourth grade.
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Bart Simpson
What? You can't hold me back. I'll do better. I promise... No, I mean it. You can't hold me back. I swear I'm gonna do better. Look at my eyes. See the sincerity? See the conviction? See the fear? As God as my witness, I can pass the fourth grade.
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Otto
Get off the bus or forever hold your peace, little dudes.
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Otto
That's it? Hey, relax man. It could end up being the best thing that ever happened to ya'. I got held back in the fourth grade myself. Twice. Look at me, man. Now I drive the school bus!
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Martin Prince
Oh, I'm sorry Bart. I'm unfamiliar with the rules of your sport. I didn't want to interfere with the ball in play. Well, back to the forecastle of the pique... You have your ball, I have nothing else of value.
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Martin Prince
They laugh at me? I'd always considered myself rather popular... My speed with numbers? My years of service as a hall monitor? My prize winning dioramas? These things mean nothing to them?
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Martin Prince
Alrighty, let's have a looksee at your study area?.. Yes, your sanctuary from the hurly burly of modern life... Oh no no no no. This won't do at all. We're gonna have to clean up this room and we'll clearly need a few ferns in here. No study area is complete without adequate plant life.
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Bart Simpson
Only geeks sit in the front seat. From now on you sit in the back row and that's not just on the bus. That goes for school and church too... so no one can see what you're doing.
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Martin Prince
Oh, I think I understand. The potential for mischief varies inversely with ones proximity to the authority figure.
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Martin Prince
Who would have thought that pushing a boy into the girls laboratory could be such a thrill? The screams! The humiliation! The fact that it wasn't me! I've never felt so alive.
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Martin Prince
Who cares about some test? Life's too short for tests... Ha ha ha! The Martin Prince you made a deal with no longer exists! Come on fellas! To the arcade!
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Bart Simpson
Well old timer, I guess this is the end of the road? I know I haven't always been a good kid but if I have to go to school tomorrow I'll fail the test and be held back. I just need one more day to study Lord. I need your help... a teachers strike, a power failure, a blizzard, anything that'll cancel school tomorrow. I know it's askin' a lot but if anyone can do it, you can. Thanking you in advance. Your pal, Bart Simpson.
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Lisa Simpson
Prayer. The last refuge of a scoundrel.
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Bart Simpson
Cowabunga!
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Marge Simpson
Remember to take a break if your arms go numb.
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Lisa Simpson
I heard you last night, Bart. You prayed for this. Now your prayers have been answered. I'm no theologian. I don't know who or what God is exactly. All I know is he's a force more powerful than mom and dad put together and you owe him big.
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Mr. Burns
Why you young ragamuffin. I was never one to back away from a snowball fight. Smithers, you may fire at will.
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Mayor Quimby
I hereby declare this day to be Snowday. The funest day in the history of Springfield.
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Bart Simpson
I passed! I got a D-! I passed! ... I... kissed the teacher!
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